Reflections…

You guys!! 2011 was my very first FULL year of business and it was SO much fun! It was also SO much more than I expected it to be.  In the 1 year and 2 months since I officially launched CSP I’ve shot over 80 sessions, with 5 of them being weddings. On average thats almost 6 sessions a month, which is absolutley crazy when I think about it. Especially since I already had 1 little dude to take care of and now there’s 2 in the picture!! ♥

Sometimes most of the time  I worry/wonder about what lies ahead for CSP and how it (hopefully) will keep growing. I’ll admit that I spend more than half of my life in nail-biting suspense over this little venture. There have been countless sleepless nights and insurmountable moments of self doubt but somehow, and only with the help of my hubby and friends, and of course God, I seem to have made it through this first year ok. Len often tells me that I’m way too hard on myself and that I criticize my work way too much, which is probably more true, but I like to think that I’m challenging myself and pushing myself to continue getting better and better even if i DO make myself sick to the stomach over it sometimes.  

What really strikes me about all of this is that God so obviously had a direction for me in all of this, because being a photographer and running my own business was never, EVER something I had ever envisioned for myself – it kind of just happened. Somewhere along the line God prompted my hubby to buy me my first DSLR and then He prompted each and every one of my clients to reach out for my business.  Thats incredibly humbling for me to recognize since I was never one of those people who just knew what their God-given talent was.  I spent most of my life in a state of despair thinking that I was the only person in the world who had nothing to offer anyone. My one and only dream had been to become something or someone in the area of creative writing (don’t judge me based on my antics here…because its been many, many moons since I’ve sat down and worked on that skill..) but never actually believed that I’d get any where with anything because somebody else out there was always better.

What a lousy attitude that was. And what a waste of all the free time I had before my boys came along.

In any regard, I am where I am now. And what I love sooo much about CSP is that its mine. Its all me, in every aspect. I can choose to try and take it further or keep it right where it is, and I can choose to love it or hate it regardless of how much better I think everyone else. I have put blood, sweat and tears into this company and it takes me away from my boys at times but I wouldn’t trade it or give it back for anything. I am SO thankful. To God for bringing me here and for the recognition that there’s always room for improvement no matter who you are or what you do.

So…my goal for 2012?? Learning to be content with where I am but always striving to get better in a healthy way 😉 I’m hoping to do that by attending workshops and shooting more personal projects so hopefully you’ll see lots more growth on this blog and lots of really fun projects 🙂

And seriously you guys – thank you so, so, SO much to each and every one of you who contributed to the growth of CSP in this last year. Each and every booked session, every comment, like and share on facebook and every small inquisition about how things were going has meant so much and has really pushed me to keep going forward with this! I seriously have had the best clients, friends and family this year and I am ridiculously excited to see what this new year brings!! 🙂

Muchos Gracia, Amigos (I  might just make it a goal to learn spanish this year too :D)

Char

(thanks to my beautiful friend Renae for this photo of my testosterone filled family 😉 )